Peter asks: “Lord, where are you going? Lord, why can’t I follow you now?” The Lord’s heart must have warmed again to his friend Peter.[1] Judas in the end refused to have a loving relationship with Jesus. Instead a beautiful relationship of love was formed between Jesus and Peter.
“I will lay down my life for you.” said Peter and he demonstrated his love for Jesus by risking his life in drawing out his sword in the mount of Olives. Yet at the last moment when the shadow of death approached, he was no different from the other disciples in deserting the Lord and even denying him. The Lord, who knew Peter better than he knew himself, foretold that he will disown the Lord that night. Peter was shocked by his words but eventually it happened as Jesus predicted.
Why did this tragedy take place?
Anyone who thinks that following Jesus is a heroic act cannot avoid repeating the same mistake of Peter. Following Jesus is to respond to his call and to recognize in the very act of following him that both the call and the response are his gift to us and not our prowess.[2]
The Lord is always unchanging but as situations change our prowess is changing and not trustworthy. We are too vulnerable before God.
We are warned not to let our optimistic estimate of our human capabilities be our guide. Christians, above all people, should be conscious of their weakness and of their constant need for divine help. All that we have and all that we are we owe to our Lord.[3] What we need is not our untrustworthy prowess but the grace of the Lord. We should humbly seek the Lord and ask for his grace.
In the end Peter turned away from the cross. Yet Jesus was determined to give his life for his beloved and went to the cross. The path of the cross is the path of the greatest love and the greatest sacrifice.
Jesus replied, “Where I am going, you cannot follow now, but you will follow later” (v. 36).
The disciples cannot come where he is going, that is, to the bosom of the Father’s love (1:18, 17:24 end). The reason for this is that they do not love one another with the infinite love with which he has loved them.[4] His new commandment given to us was that our love together should be as his for us. When we love with this love of sacrifice, we may also go to the bosom of God.
“Jesus replied, “But you will follow later” (v. 36).
It is the greatness of Jesus that he sees the heroic even in the coward; He sees in us, not only what we are, but also what he can make us. Jesus has the love to see what we can be and the power to make us attain to it.[5]
Aren’t we following Jesus because of nothing else but the faith in his love for us?
[1] Phillips, Exploring the Gospel of John, 261.
[2] Marrow, The Gospel of John, 247.
[3] Morris, Reflections on the Gospel of John, 487-488.
[4] Lightfoot, St. John’s Gospel: A Commentary, 268.
[5] Barclay, The Gospel of John,177.
