1 Samuel 25:39-43

David’s marriage to Abigail 25:39-43

David thanked God for vindicating him and for preventing him from doing evil. Abigail had been the instrument that God had used to do this (1 Samuel 25:39). It was proper for David to give thanks since he had left Nabal in the Lord’s hands and had not sought revenge.

It is easy to see why David found Abigail so attractive. Not only was she intelligent (cf. 2 Chronicles 30:22; Psalms 111:10; Proverbs 13:15) and beautiful (1 Samuel 25:3; cf. Genesis 29:17; Esther 2:7), but she was also a soul sister with David (cf. Jonathan). She shared his view of life and his commitment to God. However, since from creation God’s will has been monogamy (Genesis 2:24), it was wrong for him to marry her (1 Samuel 25:39). He had also previously married Ahinoam of Jezreel (1 Samuel 25:43). Perhaps he justified his second marriage with the fact that Saul had taken Michal from him (1 Samuel 25:44). Perhaps he got into polygamy also because it was customary in the ancient Near East for great warriors and monarchs to have many wives and concubines (mistresses). Yet God forbade this of Israel’s kings (Deuteronomy 17:17).

David did not restrain himself in his relations with women, and this caused him major problems later in his life. The same words "sent" and "took her" appear both here (1 Samuel 25:40) and in the account of David’s affair with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 11:4). We see here the seed problem that bore bitter fruit in David’s adultery.

Should Abigail have agreed to become David’s wife? It appears that she had a choice (1 Samuel 25:42). I do not believe she should have agreed to marry David, who was already married to someone else (Genesis 2:24), if she was truly free to decide. Abigail may have felt a need for security since her husband had died, and David was an attractive man with whom she shared much in common. Furthermore he was destined to become king. Yet he was married. Her decision is certainly understandable, though not commendable.

We can learn a great deal from wise Abigail. We can see how a godly person responds to a spouse’s folly: by preserving and protecting the spouse rather than by ignoring the folly. We see how a godly person responds to a foolish spouse: by honoring him or her rather than by despising him or her. We see how a godly person responds to favors bestowed: by returning them generously rather than by taking them for granted. We see how a godly person responds to other godly people: by helping them rather than by opposing them. We see how a godly person responds to being vulnerable: by sacrificing oneself for others rather than by becoming arrogant. We see how a godly person responds to the threat of danger: by trusting in God and behaving wisely rather than by ignoring the danger. We see how a godly person responds to the desire for security. In this last lesson Abigail is a negative example rather than a positive one. We do so by relying on God to provide legitimately rather than by seizing security.