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And Samuel died; and all the Israelites were gathered together, and lamented him, and buried him in his house at Ramah.

1 Samuel 25:1a, NIV

When my maternal grandfather died, they shut down his small North Dakotan town to bury him.

That’s the sort of impact I hope to have on those around me. I want to live my life so that I am missed when I am no longer walking this earth.

Cheaters play the “short game” when they destroy their families and communities through their sin. Yes, it is pleasurable for the moment. However, their sad legacy is one of destruction.

As faithful spouses, we have an opportunity to have a powerful, positive legacy.

We can leave a legacy to our communities as one that does not tolerate the evils of adultery (see Deuteronomy 22:22). Instead, we honor marriage so much that we will not stay in a marriage with an unrepentant cheater.

Some of us will have the opportunity–after some healing–to start a new family with another spouse. We can bring our gifts and develop a positive legacy with that family as well.

We are in a better position than the cheater to do this since we are not starting anew with such catastrophic sin issues in our heart.

One sort of thing I told the clients at my last job about grief was:

I want to live my life so that people cry over my death.

Not that I wish them pain. I just desire to have made such strong, loving connections with others that the loss of that connection matters to them.

It is my hope that I embody God’s love well enough in my life and ministry to some people, at least, that they feel my absence.

I do not seek fame in this. That is unnecessary. Rather, I just hope those around me can tell I genuinely love them.

What will be your legacy?


*A version of this post ran previously.

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Republished with permission from, featuring inspiring Bible verses about Keep legacy in mind – Divorce Minister.

Republished with permission from

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