Ephesians 4:31

The fifth exhortation is to get rid of five vices and to adopt three virtues. Paul now listed some sins that grieve the Spirit. Bitterness is the opposite of sweetness and kindness (cf. Colossians 3:19). It harbors resentment and keeps a record of wrongs done (cf. 1 Corinthians 13:5).

"Every Christian might well pray that God would teach him how to forget." [Note: Barclay, p. 188.]

Wrath or rage flows from bitterness and refers to outbursts of uncontrolled passionate frustration. Anger is inappropriate noisy assertiveness and abuse. Clamor or brawling describes shouting. Slander refers to words that hurt another person. Malice is bad feelings and is the source of the other four vices. [Note: See René A. López, "A Study of Pauline Passages with Vice Lists," Bibliotheca Sacra 168:671 (July-September 2011):301-16.]

This verse may seem to contradict Ephesians 4:26. There Paul permitted anger, but here he seems to condemn it (cf. James 1:19-20). Two explanations are possible. First, we may view the command in Ephesians 4:26 as governing angry behavior even though anger is never God’s will (Ephesians 4:31). Similarly God gave instructions concerning whom divorced Israelites could remarry even though divorce was never God’s will (Deuteronomy 24:1-4; Malachi 2:16). A second possibility is that Ephesians 4:26 means anger is proper in certain circumstances, but we should normally avoid it. This seems to me to be a better explanation. Jesus Himself was angry occasionally (cf. Mark 3:5). Anger does not produce the righteous life that God desires, so as a rule we should avoid it (James 1:20).