Ten months after Ray and I were married we had baby Sherry.
Eleven and a half months later we had Margie.
Seventeen months later we had Buddy.
And immediately after that, Ray had a shrew for a wife.
My problem wasn't Ray or the babies; all four were adorable! My problem was no quiet time, no focus. My eyes weren't fixed on Jesus, they were fixed on what I had to do.
A work-centered life gets complex, and it leads to burnout. A Christ-centered life -- even in the midst of work -- stays basically simple, nourished and rested.
(When I got ornery enough to get desperate, I got back to Jesus again. Then little by little I didn't yell so much, and I guess Ray decided he could stick out being married to me after all.)
Learn from two of my weak areas:
One, especially in earlier days, sometimes I wasn't really as busy as I felt I was busy. The pressure I put on myself kept "overheating my motor" and making me feel pushed.
Two, I tended to feel crowded periods before they ever arrived, and to be tired just from anticipating them.
You see, our actual living is between our ears. If you're unhappy or anxious over what's happening or what's going to happen, that's what tenses your muscles and starts to erode you.
Then don't fix your eyes on what you have to do. When I've done that it's made me fragmented and harried.
"Martha, Martha," the Lord said, "you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed. Mary has chosen what is better" (Luke 10:41-42).
Martha's problem wasn't cooking, it was the "many things." She was multi-directional, which always makes us oppressed, nervous, burdened, self-pitying, off-balance.
When your eyes are on Him you begin to develop a reflex action inside you -- it may take time -- that shuns what's complicating, what's overwhelming. You'll find you want to do less (but do the most important things) to become more.
Although truly, the more you become, the more you actually achieve. And then your life begins to have wider-ranging and longer-lasting effects.
Fix your eyes on Jesus! Like Mary, focus; that's what I had to learn. Become a "one-thing" person (Luke 10:42).
How do you do this?
First, begin to develop the habit of continual fellowship with Him (see chapter 18) in the midst of it all.
Second, determine to give Him the sacrifice of a regular "quiet time" (see chapter 19). Yes, it will be a true sacrifice. ("You will never find time for anything," says Charles Bixton. "If you want time you must make it.")
Third, give Him frequent spaces when you momentarily quit, relax, breathe deeply, stretch your body, and say, "Jesus, my eyes are on You. You are able. You are helping me from one moment to the next. I trust You."
As you seek to do those three things and release control to Him, He will
make the hours stretch,
bring others to help you,
cancel some things you thought you had to do,
show you duties you can delegate,
show you duties which don't have to be done at all.
I didn't learn my lessons once for all. I've had to come back over and over to take seriously again His practical words,
Reverence for God adds hours to each day (Proverbs 10:27, TLB).
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Let's pray to Him -- you and I, Anne Ortlund -- together:
Lord Jesus, according to Matthew 11:29, we take Your yoke upon us. We want to learn from You -- Creator, Producer, Worker, Achiever! Be our Model, and teach us Your rhythm for living, so that as we live, we'll find rest for our souls. In Your dear name, amen.
* * * * *
For the weariest day
May Christ be thy stay.
For the darkest night
May Christ be thy light.
For the weakest hour
May Christ be thy power.
For each moment's fall
May Christ be thy all.
--Old benediction
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