How To Love Your Wife - Part 3
by Robert Mains
Ephesians 5
Your wife has needs. She needs the stability and the direction of a spiritual leader. Husbands need to pray together with their wives. Instead of TV put God and your wife first. Your convictions about this will be based on scripture. No double standards – if it is wrong for your wife it is wrong for you.
Your wife needs to see that your actions are willing to follow your convictions. She can see this by the friends you have, by controlling your temper, by making sure your priorities are in order, by controlling the TV Hebrews 5:14. Have high standards for your children. Your responsibility is to teach your children and direct them in the things of the Lord.
Your wife needs to know that she is meeting vital needs in your life and work that no other woman can do. She provides a potential for power in your prayer 1 Peter 3:7, because if you are not loving her you cannot expect God to answer your request. She is an alarm system against other women with wrong motives. Job 31:1 "Make a covenant with your eyes not to look…."
She is a safeguard to hasty decisions because of her need for security and consistency. Wives can discern the needs of their children better than a husband usually. When the husband falls into sin he needs to realize the devastating influence on the family. She needs to see and hear that you cherish her, that you delight in her as a person. Do you have something that you cherish more than your wife? Do you spend time with her? Does she know that she is of great value to you? She needs to hear the character qualities that attracted you to her when you first met.
She needs to know that you understand her by protecting her in areas of her own limitations. For example, staying up too late, frustration under pressure of a job. Her dress should not attract attention to her body. Help her if she is usually late in arriving at destinations. She needs to know that you are protecting her, that there are boundaries, but always in gentleness and love.
She needs to know that you enjoy setting aside quality time for intimate conversation. This can come only if there is a oneness of spirit. Take care of wounded spirits. Plan on a time together, shopping, going out to dinner. The husband is to look nice when he goes out to dinner, watch his manners. Treat your wife as though you were dating her. Open the door for her. Dress for the occasion. By the way you dress relates to the respect that you have for the one you come with and also the respect and attitude that you have toward the one you have come to worship. Plan your conversation with your wife. Some have a fear of growing old, becoming unattractive to her husband, husband losing his job, education for the children, physical safety while going to work or at work. Or what would she do if her husband died (a will). Resolve her fears.
She needs to know that you are aware of her presence even when your mind is on other matters. The wise gentleman will be considerate, showing sympathy, being helpful, tactful, courteous, compassionate, unselfish, polite, understanding, thoughtful, using social manners. You have a special relationship going at our house. Your wife is deeply in love with you. These characteristics will be evident if the Holy Spirit controls your life. You will teach your children how to love their wives by expressing consideration in these areas.
She needs to see that you are making investments in her life that will expand and fulfill her world. You need to encourage your wife always, more and more, in becoming the fulfilled person that God wants her to be. Work on areas of her spiritual gifts. Show her that there is real joy in putting Christ first. She needs to look to her husband for being the spiritual leader. And that is too big a job for any husband to do without God's wisdom. What causes the spirit of a wife to react to the spirit of her husband? When you are not in harmony with each other.
Be the first to react on this!
